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i dont even know what the fuck is going on. like, so much has happened in the past 2 weeks and i cant handle it anymore.
my "bestfriend" talked shit about me to her ex. like really? than tries being all coool with me and saying "oh whats wrong breee" blahblahblah. okay, what the fuck do you think is wrong?! my BESTFRIEND who i do everything for and who i let walk all over me fucking talks shit about me? nahhh. thats not how it goes. im done. we fight to much. im over it. i can find another bestfriend. it just sucks finding out that your just like EVERYONE else! ever since that fucking dick came into your life, you havent been the same. youve changed. were like not as close, were not the same bestfriends because of him. he came in, broke your heart, than turned you agaisnt me. fuck you, fuck him, fuck all of this. i dont need this anymore. i dont want a bestfriend anymore. i dont need one, there all just let downs. whatever.
and to make it all worse, now that im upset a boy i dont have my bestfriend to sit there give me a ciggerate and make evverything better. i have to cope with this on my own. and it sucks. i dont think i can do it. i need someone. but there's noone. cause they all tell me the same shit, like oh bre get over it. there's other fish in the sea blahblahblah, yea i know but fuck cant someone make me feeel better without saying that shit. like, i dont want pity. i juss want someone to put me a better mood. whatever, fuck it. i guess kyle will make me feel better when i see him tommrow at school. i think hes the only boy i trust. i think hes the only person i can trust. i hate this more than anything. i hate when shit falls apart. i know its gonna get better but i hate that feeling you have until it gets better. im not strong enough to handle all this shit on my own. i wish i was. i guess its time to start becomming stronger.