there's nothing you can say, nothing you can do.

ive been in such shitty mooods latley, i dont know what the fuck is wrong with me latley. but i wanna go back to how i use to be. i wanna be smiling all the time. i wanna be happy like i use to, i wanna be able to walk in a room without someone asking if im okay, or if ive been crying :[
i mean i dont have the best life, but i dont have the shittest. i just want things go right for once. yeaaaa, things are going better than they were a couple months ago but the small things like getting jamie back as a friend is always a plus, getting chuck back makes me fucking smile nonstop. but im losing brandi slowly to drugs. im not gonna pass high school when im suppsoto. ive reliazed the way i am, and ALOT of fucken people dont like me from my past. i have friends but there fucking assholes to me. i dont even fucking know anymore. i really want new friends, i really want a boyfriend. i really want my freckles to go away. i really miss chris. i really want brandi back. i really wanna move to chacigo. i really just wanna start over..



i fucking hate my freckles. i got made fun of cause of them for like a whoooole fucking day. like are they REALLY that fucken bad?! i wish i liked them. i want them to go away. gah, when i dont wear that much makeup people are like ewww, look at your freckls, and when i wear makup there like eww, you wear too much makeup. like what the fuck! what do you fucking want!? seriouslyyy. fuck it. =l


I DONT EVEN ABOUT ANYTHING ANYMORE.
things are falling apart, & i cant stand it anymore.