Demeter the Greek Goddess

i wish i never got so attached, i wish you didnt have that fucking smile, i wish you didnt hold me when you hugged me, i wish you didnt have those amazing eyes, i wish you didnt have that adorable laugh, i wish you werent sucha man whore, i wish i never fucking met you. i FUCKING HATE YOU but than i see you and all these feelings come rushing back to me and i cant help but smile around you. i should have never made the mistake of telling everyone i thought you were cute, or how i wanted you. i should have never went to your house that day. i should have never kissed you, i should have never went in your room, i should have never agreeeded to anything you said. i should have told you i was a virgin so you coulda said no, and i wouldnt have been so fucking attached. i shouldnt have done anything with you. my mistake was looking at your blue eyes and kissing you. once our lips touched i was hoooked. and the sad thing is im attached on you, I FUCKING LIKE YOU MORE THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW and what am i to you? juss another hook up. you even told me. i said okay. but inside i was broken. you dont know what you fucking do to me. you break me down in the hall when you dont say hi, when you dont hug me, when you flirt with other girls in front of me it hurts. no it dosent just hurt it fucking kills. that time you saw me crying at school its cause of YOU! its all cause of you. i broke down twice cause of you. i cant handle seeing you, but when i dont i get sad. so im fucked either fucking way. i should have listened to everyone telling me your a man whore and your juss gonna fuck me over but i decided to listen to my 'heart' and do what i wanted for a change and look where it left me. CRYING EVERY FUCKING NIGHT! yeah i fucking cry evernight cause of you. look what you do to me, and you dont even care. your too busy smoking your weed, getting drunk, and fucking all these other fucking nasty cunts. i cant take it anymore. i dont know what the fuck im gonna do. i cant get anyone else, and i dont want anyone else but YOU! i wont get with another boy. i cant. i dont know what the fuck im gonna fucking do. i'm stuck. i cant take the crying anymore. i feel fucking patheic. ive never once been this attached to a boy. and the sad thing is you DONT like me. you used me to get in my pants. you got what you wanted and left. you told cody you were done with me, than you message me saying how you want me and all this bullshit. stop fucking with me, please :( i cant do this anymore. i honestly wanna fucking move away, far away from you so i never have to see you again. tooo bad i cant live without seeing you. YOU HAVE ME GOING INSANE. stop with the mind games. im loosing all self control. you called me last night at like 11 saying you wanna see me and shit. you werent drunk you were juss high and than you called me at like 1:30, than 2:30 and like 7 times in betweeen. all cause you wanted 'some' welll HEY FUCKER im not your little sex toy you can play with whenever the fuck you want. i have feeelings too. but you dont care. ahhhh. >:/ all i want is for you to know how i feel, and if we keep hooking up you only hook up with ME and actually devolp feelings for me and not keep leading me on. OH and i want my bestfriend here. but she's never around anymore.. ): we dont hang out everyday, i only see her on the weekends. well not recently. i miss her. FUUUUUUCK.